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Wednesday, 28 March 2012

The many ways to say 'I love you'


HUMANS are social beings, we have love needs and these needs must be met. In fact, in order to survive, our love cups must have a consistent source from which love flows. The fuller the cup, the better it will be for our souls, our sanity, and our survival. A love cup that is empty can lead to frustration, depression and temptation.
Although we were created to love and to be loved, many persons, both married and single, are love starved; longing for a tender touch, a fond look, or a warm embrace. Some are pining for that special someone to have and to hold, that someone to make them feel alive, needed, wanted, cherished, special and loved.
Let me gently remind you all, our men in particular, that spouses never grow tired of hearing those three little words repeated -- 'I love you'. Ask any of your lady friends and she will tell you that ladies never get tired of hearing the men in their lives whisper in their ear or even say it out loud. It means the world to a woman to hear her man say 'I love you'.
Dear fellows, please note that expressing your love will not make you less of man. Nothing is wrong if you take the time to verbalise how you are feeling. Telling the lady in your life that you love her will help to build her confidence and her self-esteem, it will contribute to her overall happiness, and can put her in the mood to love you more.
Since women are more emotional than men, it is always much easier for them to express their feelings. Most men will stifle their feelings or find it much more difficult to say 'I love you'. So then fellows, while we ladies try to be patient and try to understand that you might be struggling to repeat those three little words, permit me to take the audacity, on behalf of us ladies, to remind you men out there that there are many ways to say I love you.



* Say 'I love you' with flowers: Even if you can't afford to buy your woman a dozen red roses, just buy her one red rose, she will still appreciate it and will see it for the romantic gesture that it is.
* Say 'I love you' with compliments: When you compliment you spouse what you are really doing is saying, 'I love you and that is why I took the time to notice that particular thing about you and to compliment you on it'.
* Say 'I love you' with gifts: Actions speak louder than words, no wonder, one of the easiest ways to say I love you, is through the giving of gifts.
* Say 'I love you' with a warm embrace: Silence is golden. There are times when all that is needed is a warm embrace. Practice to hug your spouse very often and communicate love through hugging.
* Say 'I love you' with your support: When you support your spouse he/she will not have to question your love, your support speaks volumes, sometimes more than you know.
* Say 'I love you' with communication: It is hard to love a person with whom there is little or no communication. When you spend time in communication, what you are saying is this, 'because I love you I want to talk with you'.

Jacqueline Champier is a counselling psychologist.